Hey there cool cats and kittens! So….I’m stuck like chuck. I’ve been getting certifications, applying to jobs so I can get my black ass to New York and nada. It may because it’s the summer and everyone’s in chill mode. I don’t know but yeah…that’s where I’m at right now. Not moving forward. Argh!

I was talking to my mom this morning and she was pretty much telling me that New York may not be the move, at least not right now. She thinks that God may want me to go somewhere else. It was a little frustrating talking to her because she kept saying, I need to talk to God…I’m like, “uh, he can see me down here struggling, bored and sooooo over it…so what else am I supposed to do? I will say, I’ve literally tried to move to NYC 4 times. First time, I get all the way up there, walk into the damn realtor’s office, she asks “Is your credit score 700?” To which I reply “No, but it’s in the sixes.” To which she replied, I won’t be able to help you unless you have a guarantor co-sign that makes 80 times the rent. I can’t tell y’all how irked I was. Bitch! That could’ve been a motherfucking email! I told you I live in fucking Philly! It took me 2 and a half hours to get here! Then….I started working on my credit, was tryna get back out there and the the Pandemic hit and the city shut down. THEN when the city starts opening again, apartments were a little cheaper, I find an apartment I like, make an appointment to see the spot, drive to see it and don’t you know they rented that motherfucker right before I got there. Like literally! Then the realtor kept showing me a bunch of trash ass apartments – literally with the bathroom in the bedroom and suggested I sell all my shit so I can live in one of the wack ass apartments she showed me…so then, I decided to chill and check again in the new year, new year comes, I made up in my mind that I’m headed the fuck out of here by hook, crook or steal and…and…don’t you know, I was pulling an English muffin out of the oven and my shoulder dislocates!?! Like full ass dislocation, I broke something! I had to go to physical therapy for 8 months! Now I’m ready and the rent’s sky high…

So what the fuck!?! I’ve been stuck in the same routine, same everything for like 2 years. I want to leave MOVEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I want new experience, new people, new adventures, new scenery! Fuck! I need to get good at my craft as well! I need stage time! My mom also told me this story of how Cedric the Entertainer got put on because he did Steve Harvey’s show in Texas. (Before they were famous) Basically she’s saying I may not have to move to New York to catch my blessing.

I don’t know what the hell is going on but it needs to start getting on!!


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